Everyone at WTCCR would like to thank you all for reading our blog. Our mission was to write posts that would brighten your day, we hope you found it comical and maybe even learned a thing or two. Sadly, the time has come for this blog to come to a close. Goodbyes are never fun, unless it's to something you don't like, and we hope that isn't the case here. But maybe it isn't goodbye for you....... maybe this blog will inspire you to write your own humor blog and continue to brighten other peoples' days!
Thanks again everyone!
The Contributing Team
Why the Chicken Crossed the Road
Tuesday, March 17, 2015
Tuesday, March 10, 2015
A Great Yet Terrible Time
Ever since I was born, I have had to deal with cerebral palsy. This is a movement disorder which impairs
motor skills and sometimes speech. It is
caused by damage to the brain. In my
case, the cerebral palsy causes me to walk on my left toe (instead of heel first)
and avoid bearing weight on my left side. In February of 2014, I had surgery that helped
to fix my gait. We had considered this
surgery for several months and had finally decided to go ahead with it. The surgical procedure was as follows: The surgeon would slice my leg open, saw my femur
in two, rotate it, and reattach it with a plate and screws. He would also lengthen my left calf and
hamstring muscles. The surgery was to
take place at Cincinnati Children's hospital.
The day
before the surgery, my parents drove me down to Cincinnati .
I was not supposed to eat after 9:00 p.m., or drink after 3:00 a.m. The surgery was to start between 7:00 and 8:00
the next morning. That night none of us
slept very well because we were anticipating it.
We got up
at about 4:00 a.m. and headed over to the hospital. After I waited for a little while, a nurse came
in and helped me to prepare for the surgery.
I put on a hospital gown and waited.
Soon, it was time. I said good-bye
to my parents and then another nurse wheeled my bed into the operating
room. I climbed onto the operating
table. The doctors gave me laughing gas
to help calm me down, and then one of them said: "There's going to be a
little poke." I felt the little
poke, and soon after that didn't remember anything else for a good long while.
When I woke
up, I was lying in a hospital bed with both legs immobilized. I tapped on the hard, red cast with my
hand: It extended from my left hip all
the way down to my toes. I then thought
to myself: "Why can't I move my
right knee? The doctor was only supposed
to operate on my left leg." For
some reason, both of my legs were immobilized.
I heard my parents' voices asking me how I was doing. They told me the doctor had found that my
right hamstring was quite tight, so he had lengthened it during the
surgery. Within the first half hour of
my awakening, when I was still having trouble talking, I managed to croak
: "What's for dinner?" This is one of my all-time favorite questions
to ask my mom most days.
I felt
quite sleepy and drugged from the anesthesia, and I also still had an epidural
in my back: This was a small needle
which fed medicine into my spinal cord to stop the pain. The medicine numbed everything from the
needle to partway down my legs. This
meant that I had to have a catheter put in.
Luckily, the doctors did this while I was asleep. Once I had regained consciousness, a nurse
wheeled me down to a hospital room, and I rested there for a while. I had to eat ice chips before I was allowed to
eat anything more filling. After a full six
hours of eating nothing but ice chips, I was quite hungry and ready for
something more substantial. However, they
still wouldn't allow normal food. All I
could eat was Jell-O. After eating a few
cups of Jell-O I was almost ready for bed.
Finally, the nurse said that I could eat real food, so we ordered a
dinner roll and a muffin (which was basically a cupcake). I ate the roll and saved the cupcake for the
next day.
The next
morning, I ordered an omelet for breakfast.
This omelet had ham, cheese, green peppers, and onions inside of
it. It was the ham that I enjoyed the
most. I enjoyed it so much that after I
got home, my dad challenged himself to make an omelet that I thought was better
than the "hospital omelet."
After breakfast each day, a team of people in white suits came in to ask
me how my pain was. I always said that
it wasn't terrible. The pain team, and
other doctors and nurses, commented on my stuffed crocodile peeking out from
under the sheets. My six-year-old sister
had sent her favorite stuffed animal along to help comfort me during the
surgery. It was a very generous gift.
One time,
the nurse gave me some morphine for pain.
After a few minutes, I began to feel very drugged and loopy. It was about this time that someone helped me
onto a bedside commode so that I could try to go to the bathroom. This did not go very well, because I felt so
drugged that I just wanted to go to sleep.
Another time, my sheets suddenly felt very wet. We discovered that my catheter tubing had come
unhooked. My cast could get wet! My room suddenly filled with nurses who scrambled
to reattach the tubing. As they said,
catheter tubing usually never came unhooked, but mine somehow did. Instead of the cast, my knee immobilizer got
wet. The nurses did not give me a new
knee immobilizer; they just let the existing one dry.
I hated
wearing the knee immobilizer, especially at night. I had to wear it to keep my muscles stretched
out. It was uncomfortable, and quite
restrictive. The knee immobilizer was a black
piece of fabric that wrapped around my leg.
Ten Velcro straps held my leg against metal strips inside of it. I had to wear one knee immobilizer (and
sometimes two) most nights for almost a year after my surgery.
One day at
the hospital a physical therapist helped me to get out of the bed and stand up
for the first time after my surgery. Standing
up made my leg hurt, and made me feel lightheaded. The physical therapist once again helped me
to get onto the bedside commode. I had a
lot of trouble getting back onto the bed, so much trouble that I cried. The day before I went home, I was able to get
into a wheelchair and go to a playroom.
I played video games for a while there, and then I went back to my room.
The day
that I went home, my dad had to lay a plastic crate between the middle seats of
our van so that I could lay my legs across them. When we got home, there was a big sign across
the garage door which said "Welcome Home." My siblings and grandparents had made it. My dad pushed my wheelchair into the house
and the rehab began. I have gone through
a lot, but it has been worth it.
- D.E. Frangipani
Saturday, March 7, 2015
You Had One Job
Life is tough. And everybody makes mistakes, right? Some people's mistakes are just funnier than others....
11. Yeah, that's really useful.
12. Popcorn, Popcorn, Baby just didn't catch on...
13. I think this is how WWIII will start.
14. He wishes...
If you were feeling like a failure, I hope this made you change your mind (unless you were one of the people who did these things... in that case at least you know you are not alone.)
Have you ever seen something like these? Have you ever done one yourself? Which one made you laugh the most? Let me know in the comments!
1. Well... It's juicy all right.
2. In what world!?
3. Another unachievable beauty standard.
4. 3rst? Thirst? A pun or just stupidity? The world may never know...
5. I never really liked McDonalds, but really?
6. Oh boy, I just love duck back riding!
7. Okay.
8. Okay.
9. Didn't you hear? Buzz is going to be in The Age Of Ultron!
10. I'm not sure grocery stores know what bacon is...
11. Yeah, that's really useful.
12. Popcorn, Popcorn, Baby just didn't catch on...
13. I think this is how WWIII will start.
14. He wishes...
If you were feeling like a failure, I hope this made you change your mind (unless you were one of the people who did these things... in that case at least you know you are not alone.)
Have you ever seen something like these? Have you ever done one yourself? Which one made you laugh the most? Let me know in the comments!
Thursday, March 5, 2015
Ice Ice Baby
Let's talk about ice, not the kind you put in Cola but the kind you slip on.When you slip on ice it can be embarrassing and quite hard to play off. Some people laugh, others brush themselves off and walk on, while some just sit and cry. No matter what you do it's probably best to admit that slipping on ice is hilarious, unless, of course the victim is injured, then laughing is questionable.
WARNING: If you live in an area that gets cold enough to snow these gifs might bring back memories of your own incidents, so watch at your own risk.
And finally, if you feel like watching a six minute long video of people slipping check this video out:
WARNING: If you live in an area that gets cold enough to snow these gifs might bring back memories of your own incidents, so watch at your own risk.
This poor guy just wants to shovel the side walk.
Why do I get the feeling the news station created this dangerous ice slab? Watch the full video here
No words could console this poor guy .
He just can't get a handle on it.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/02/19/alan-andersen-bacontfm-ice-slip_n_4816325.html
Let us know which fail was your favorite!
Let us know which fail was your favorite!
Tuesday, March 3, 2015
How to...Get Stuck in a Tree
There are several ways to get stuck in a tree. The easiest way is to simply climb up and suddenly find you cannot climb down because a branch fell off, you’re too scared to go back down, or because you’re caught in the tree. If this ever happens to you, there are several things you can do--try to climb down anyway, jump (you may want to try and jump on something like a trampoline, but that is not always an option.), yell till someone climbs up and helps you, or stay up there forever. If you are planning on that last one, I suggest you bring snacks, blankets and something to do. Choose a tree with several comfy perches and without creatures that bite. Now, I know you are all dying to find out how I know so much about climbing trees and getting stuck in them. It just so happens that I could be considered a tree-climbing expert. I’ve done it for years. I’ve gotten stuck. I’ve also had some pretty dramatic "falling-out-of-trees" experiences. I’ve also watched my siblings in numerous tree-climbing predicaments. My youngest sister managed to get trapped in a tree two years ago. It was autumn and the chill of winter was in the air. My siblings had been rolling in a pile of leaves and then they decided to climb the tree next to the pile of leaves. Things were all going swell until Ellie got stuck. I was calmly called by my brother, “Summer, Mom needs you to bring her a ladder.” I calmly started searching for a ladder. There was a step ladder in the basement, but I thought she probably wanted the big ladder in the garage. I hunted around in the garage and then walked out into the yard to ask where the big ladder was or if the smaller ladder would be okay. I never really got to ask because Mom started yelling before I could. “Get the ladder! It’s in the basement! Hurry up, you sloth!” She was next to Ellie, who was perched in the first branches of the tree...except she wasn’t. Her knee was jammed in between the two main boughs and she was completely stuck. How she managed to do it is still a mystery. I picked up the pace a little and swiftly brought the ladder. I wasn’t fast enough, and Mom yelled at me to “run!” When I got there, I had more time to examine the situation. Slippers were brought out for Ellie’s ice cold feet. She could now stand on the ladder instead of being held up by my mother. Mom told me to go inside and call my father and inform him that he would have to come home from watching the basketball game if Ellie wasn’t unstuck in five minutes. Dad suggested that we try and pry her knee out with a wrench or a screwdriver. I related the information to Mom and decided to go inside out of the cold. Half a minute later, Ellie had been magically freed. Mom had managed to chip away the bark around Ellie’s knee.The ending was very anti-climatic. I was secretly hoping for a 911 call or at the very least the involvement of a chainsaw.
I have other tree stories as well--like the time Anna was hanging from her knees to show off and the branch broke or when I climbed up a tree to get a piece of fruit and fainted upon seeing that the branch right next to me was so covered in fire ants that you couldn’t see any bark or when my little brother climbed trees at the age of two and got stuck...every time, but I’ll end with one of my favorites.
All the members of my family agree that Rambo was the best dog ever. He was just so joyful. One of his many talents was his ability to tree people. Rambo’s favorite game was chase. A trail went by our house and was well used. Sometimes, unsuspecting travelers would get worried at the sight of Rambo and try to run away from him. This was a bad idea. If they walked, Rambo would ignore them on the grounds that they were being extremely boring, but running meant that they were up for a chase. One time a boy was riding by on a bike and got so scared when Rambo started to run after him that he jumped off his bike onto a tree. A friend of ours watched the whole thing and laughed her head off before calling Rambo away. Eventually the smart people learned to walk or ride by very slowly, and everyone else found an alternate route. Our trail eventually became more like the road less traveled.I have other tree stories as well--like the time Anna was hanging from her knees to show off and the branch broke or when I climbed up a tree to get a piece of fruit and fainted upon seeing that the branch right next to me was so covered in fire ants that you couldn’t see any bark or when my little brother climbed trees at the age of two and got stuck...every time, but I’ll end with one of my favorites.
-Summer
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Sunday, March 1, 2015
Mad Libs with a Mad Man
Hey, guys, it's me, Jordan. You may know already, but if you don't, then let me let you in on a little secret. I'm crazy. I'm just kidding, but that is the most common adjective applied to my name. Wait a second. Crazy? Adjective? How did I know what I was writing about? Dun, dun, DUUUUN! That's right guys, we're doing Mad Libs.
If you don't know, Mad Libs are word games. Basically, when you are asked for a certain type of word, you give it. For instance, I ask you for an adjective and you answer, let's say, blue. That may come out as blue candy or blue face. It does get a little crazy, just like me, but that's the point. So without further ado...
Mad Lib #1
I love to Trick (Verb).video games. I can play them day and Candy Cane (Noun)! My mom and Job (Noun).are not too happy with my Kicking (Verb Ending with ING).so much time in front of the television House (Noun). Although Dad believes that these Awesome (Adjective).games help children develop hand-eye (Body Part).coordination and improve their learning Kangaroos (Plural Noun), he also seems to think they have Horrible(Adjective) side effects on one's Heart (Body Part). Both of my Wars (Plural Noun) think this is due to a Cold(Adjective) use of violence in the majority of the Killer Alligators (Plural Noun). Finally, we all arrived at a Nice(Adjective) compromise: After dinner I can play 98 (Number) hours of video games, provided I help clear the Gnat (Noun).and wash the Spark Plugs (Plural Noun).
Mad Lib #2
Now is your chance to enter this Pretty (Adjective) contest. Anyone, and we mean anyone, can enter this Friendly (Adjective).contest. Just follow these Naïve (Adjective).rules:
If you don't know, Mad Libs are word games. Basically, when you are asked for a certain type of word, you give it. For instance, I ask you for an adjective and you answer, let's say, blue. That may come out as blue candy or blue face. It does get a little crazy, just like me, but that's the point. So without further ado...
Mad Lib #1
I love to Trick (Verb).video games. I can play them day and Candy Cane (Noun)! My mom and Job (Noun).are not too happy with my Kicking (Verb Ending with ING).so much time in front of the television House (Noun). Although Dad believes that these Awesome (Adjective).games help children develop hand-eye (Body Part).coordination and improve their learning Kangaroos (Plural Noun), he also seems to think they have Horrible(Adjective) side effects on one's Heart (Body Part). Both of my Wars (Plural Noun) think this is due to a Cold(Adjective) use of violence in the majority of the Killer Alligators (Plural Noun). Finally, we all arrived at a Nice(Adjective) compromise: After dinner I can play 98 (Number) hours of video games, provided I help clear the Gnat (Noun).and wash the Spark Plugs (Plural Noun).
Mad Lib #2
Now is your chance to enter this Pretty (Adjective) contest. Anyone, and we mean anyone, can enter this Friendly (Adjective).contest. Just follow these Naïve (Adjective).rules:
Write down in 23 (Number).words or less why you think that Wyatt (Person You Know).should be elected "Polar Bear (Noun) of the Year." Remember, he does not know that you think so Kindly(Adjective) of him. First prize will be a deluxe three-speed Mexican Jumping Bean (Noun), plus a year's supply of Bread (Type of Food). Second prize is a 21-foot Hypnosis (Noun). Third prize is a full-color Pokémon (Noun), plus a set of Otters (Plural Noun). Each entry must be accompanied by a stamped, self-addressed Dream (Noun). Decision of the Rodents (Plural Noun) will be announced in 2098 (Year) and will be final. In the event of a tie, duplicate Drums (Plural Noun) will be awarded.
That one was a good one. I'd love a full-color Pokémon and a pair of Otters. If you're wondering why I put those parenthetical statements next to my answers, it's so you can play as well. Did you guys get any thing funny? If so let us know in the comments below. See yah!
-Jordan Smith
That one was a good one. I'd love a full-color Pokémon and a pair of Otters. If you're wondering why I put those parenthetical statements next to my answers, it's so you can play as well. Did you guys get any thing funny? If so let us know in the comments below. See yah!
-Jordan Smith
Thursday, February 26, 2015
Out of the Mouth of Babes.......
Hey, everybody! It’s me,
Ali! Today I’m going to give you a taste of home – literally. I wanted to share
some funny statements made by my brothers and I. Before I begin though, I will
give you a little of my family background: I have three brothers named Alex,
Anthony, & Aaron. Alex and Anthony are older than me and Aaron is a year
younger. So, have fun reading funny little blurbs from our young childhood days!
When Anthony was three,
Mom began working on teaching him different colors. To Mom’s dismay, he called
red, green and yellow fire truck, tractor and sunshine!
One day, while Mom was changing my newborn brother, Aaron’s diaper, three-year-old Anthony excitedly announced, “Look, Aaron’s
electrical cord fell off!”…..referring to his umbilical cord.
A quote from Mom about Anthony when he was 4: “Apparently
I occasionally tell you (Anthony), ‘You’re going to make me lose my patience’ because
one day you said to me, ‘Mommy, I didn’t lose your patience today!’ “
A statement made by Anthony when he turned 4: “I’m
growing big, my head is clear up to my hair!”
One day 5-year-old Anthony told someone, “We have 3
kids in our family: Alex, Aaron and me.”
When asked, “What about Ali?” Anthony
replied, “Oh, she’s a girl!”
When I was little, I liked to climb in bed with the
boys. One evening Anthony said, “I sure
hope Ali doesn’t wake me tonight ‘cause I’m desausted!”
One day Anthony, who was six, sat on the steps with our
song books, Bibles, and dollies. He said to me, “Ali, you sit up here in the
valcony (balcony).” “Okay,” I replied,
“And you be the creature (preacher).”
A highlight of the year I turned five was raising baby chicks and
butchering them. Quite a learning
experience for my whole family! The
morning after butchering, as we were sitting at the breakfast table, I said out
of the blue, “I’m sure glad I’m not a chicken!”
A statement made by my brother, Alex, when he was six:
“Someday I’m going to be an angel, Mom, but I don’t know how I’ll grow
wings!”
One evening as Mom and Dad were driving home from
church, six-year-old Alex looked up at the sky and said, “God is up in
heaven. I can’t see God. When is Jesus going to come? Wait, I think I see Jesus’ feet coming down
now!”
Another statement made by six-year-old Alex “How did
God make Anthony? Did he just put his
head and arms together?”
One day my little brother Aaron, who was about
three, showed Mom his arm and said, “Look, Mom! I’m growing fur (hair) just
like Dad!”
A statement made by 7-year-old Aaron when he wanted a haircut during harvest season: “Mom, when are
you going to combine my hair?
-Ali Gator
-Ali Gator
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